Finding peaceful solutions to violent problems no matter how difficult was rather Gregor's specialty. He had been raised to do this, it was true, and more than that it was something he felt passionately about as an individual. It was the place where his duty and his personal feelings coincided: guiding Barrayar to peaceful resolutions rather than bloody ones. It had just taken him a while, years, to realize it was something he was capable of, rather than wishful thinking. Slowly he is building his confidence in that capability.
Just as he's building confidence in Simon not overriding him, overtly or covertly in a thousand ways that would be more than simple for the head of ImpSec to commit and get away with. With this sense of trust comes Gregor finally feeling more and more at ease with being himself around him-- and part of that is being demonstrative, an action that absolutely does require trust for him.
And Simon kisses him back. Gregor worries for a moment over taking advantage. Simon of all people has enough strength of character to resist anything he doesn't want to do, but... His attitude about this whole scenario that he'd expressed when it'd first arose still worries him. So for his own peace of mind, he does this slowly, tentatively feeling his way into his first steps of what is a sincere version of this power exchange.
"You did very well," he whispers when their lips part, from only inches away, fingertips still keeping his chin quirked up for him, mouth available. "I want you to know how much I appreciate it. You." Gregor feels supremely awkward saying that, though he tries to veil it; it seems the height of conceit, of hubris, to presume that Simon Illyan might need his approval. But the fact of the matter is that he does need his approval in a practical sense, and Gregor has learned just how important the Emperor's assessment of a loyal subject's fulfillment of his duty can be to them. He's never thought of Simon as one of those before, but...
It's merely the truth. Simon does do very well, and Gregor does appreciate it. He's also fairly sure that if he feels out of place daring to say this to him, everyone else must balk completely. And everyone needs affirmation sometimes.
no subject
Just as he's building confidence in Simon not overriding him, overtly or covertly in a thousand ways that would be more than simple for the head of ImpSec to commit and get away with. With this sense of trust comes Gregor finally feeling more and more at ease with being himself around him-- and part of that is being demonstrative, an action that absolutely does require trust for him.
And Simon kisses him back. Gregor worries for a moment over taking advantage. Simon of all people has enough strength of character to resist anything he doesn't want to do, but... His attitude about this whole scenario that he'd expressed when it'd first arose still worries him. So for his own peace of mind, he does this slowly, tentatively feeling his way into his first steps of what is a sincere version of this power exchange.
"You did very well," he whispers when their lips part, from only inches away, fingertips still keeping his chin quirked up for him, mouth available. "I want you to know how much I appreciate it. You." Gregor feels supremely awkward saying that, though he tries to veil it; it seems the height of conceit, of hubris, to presume that Simon Illyan might need his approval. But the fact of the matter is that he does need his approval in a practical sense, and Gregor has learned just how important the Emperor's assessment of a loyal subject's fulfillment of his duty can be to them. He's never thought of Simon as one of those before, but...
It's merely the truth. Simon does do very well, and Gregor does appreciate it. He's also fairly sure that if he feels out of place daring to say this to him, everyone else must balk completely. And everyone needs affirmation sometimes.